Have you ever had a sinking feeling that in a certain relationship (friends, family, spouse, or boyfriend/girlfriend), you are the one that carries the burden of making it work? You call, you send texts, you go out of your way to talk, visit, or do favors.
You accept it as truth that you're always the person that cares the most. Pity parties are not fun and they are certainly not productive. But they sure seem to be what we gravitate toward.
Being made in the image of our Heavenly Father, we were made to love and have fellowship with one another; we are relational beings. The problem is often that we are oblivious to what it is we are missing; a strong relationship with our Creator. No peace or joy outside of Him is lasting. No love we think we know is like that of God because He IS love. No thrill or emotional high is more exciting than the Holy Spirit God puts inside of every believer. He is able to teach, guide, convict, and act through us to reach others.
But when we are oblivious to His presence or availability, the lack we feel leads to a false interpretation of others' actions and/or intentions.
The root of the problem can be quite a number of things, one of which could be depression. Whatever the case, we must learn to recognize our thinking patterns and destructive interpretation of things. If allowed to develop further, one might even think of unhealthy things such as, "Maybe if something happened to me and I was hospitalized or even died, they would appreciate me or notice how much I meant to them."
Has that ever crossed your mind? You're not alone. You're not alone in your thinking, in your desperation, or in life.
You need not search far and wide to find that you are indeed wanted. Though it's hard for our finite, human minds to grasp, the King of the universe, Love Himself, loves and wants you desperately. SO desperately, hating the sin that separates you from Him SO much, that He demonstrated that love for you and hate for sin, on the cross. Love Himself, the Word itself, the Prince of Peace, the Great I Am- subjected Himself to the world He created for YOU and for me. THAT'S how wanted and loved you are. It does NOT get any better than this, so why look for anything less? Why be satisfied with anything less when we already HAVE the MOST?
Not feeling wanted enough can lead to promiscuity, insecurity, and a hardened heart. When we think of it, letting it go that far is senseless and useless, but yes- it's hard to stop the ball when it's already rolling and going downhill. I get it. I've been there. I am in no way looking to dismiss the impact and pain it causes. I am , though, looking to expose the lies and reveal the Truth that sets us free; Jesus Christ. If you haven't fully surrendered every part of your life to Him, please don't wait any longer. All we'll ever need is found in Him.